Karaoké Hey I Don't Work Here Tom Cardy

Saturday morning comes and goes without too much on my mind

Except maybe lunch

I walk down to the shops just to move

Feel a bit rough from last night

I may have drunk a bit too much

A lady in the supermarket approaches way too fast

And her eyes are intense and she spits a little bit when she asks

Where do you keep the pasta

I dunno aisle three

Well can you get it for me

I just want a Gatorade but she rolls her eyes so I kind of lose it

Hey

I don't work here and if I did

I would not sell you shit

Hey

I don't work here but maybe I should

That way I could hide all of the things you want from you

Hey

I don't work here but if I did

Would I be wearing a dirty white singlet

Ya fool

Hey

I don't work here but maybe I should

Silly me

I've had the pasta all along

Fuck you

Oh woah oh

Oh woah oh

Oh woah oh

I don't work here

Oh woah oh

Oh woah oh

Oh woah oh

I don't work here

Saturday arvo comes and goes and I'm feeling pretty great

I made a middle-aged woman cry today

Walking on the hot sand at Bondi Beach

I take a rest in the lifeguard tower shade

My foresight readies me for melee

A man runs from the surf and approaches way too fast

With a bluebottle across his chest

He shakes me as he asks

You gotta save my kid

What kind of lifeguard

I can't really swim are you then

I'm just here to take a nap

But he rolls his eyes so I kind of snap

Hey

I don't work here and if I did

I would not save your kid

Hey

I don't work here but maybe I should

That way I could help relieve that nasty sting for you

Hey

I don't work here but if I did

Would I make a race car out of sand then fall asleep

Hey

I don't work here but maybe I should

But maybe I should

Maybe I should

Should do what, uh save my son

What about my son

No get a job

He's drowning

Your son's fine

He just swims weird

And you shouldn't hold that

Oh my God thank you

I can't begin to against him

He's gone

Saturday night comes and goes without too much on my mind

Just kicking a ball down the street

I give it too much juice and it flies over the fence of my local NASA compound

Just bear with me

Guards are all passed out

It seems there's been a planned attack

The alarm is blaring loud but I'm the only one intact

I try to phone for help but unfortunately there's an alien transmitting itself to NASA screens specifically

Give us ya planet

Okay I don't

Let me find someone alright

Just relax

Give us ya planet

I, I, I said, okay

We're under attack

Give us ya planet

Okay I don't have the authority to do that

I just came to get my ball but it's been a long day so I speak for us all

Hey

I don't work here and if I did

I would not surrender shit

Hey

I don't work here but maybe I should

That way I could take a trip to Mars and strangle you

Hey

I don't work here but if I did

Do you think the president of Earth has a fuckin' mullet

Hey

I don't work here but maybe I should

That way I could put my planetary fist in you

Maybe I should

That way I could teach your kid to drown in front of you

Maybe I should

That way I could hide all of the linguini from you